Where does my help come from?

This just doesn't get easier. All of the things people say about grief are true. It's unpredictable. It's a rollercoaster. It comes in waves. Right now I feel like I've been hit by a tsunami. How is it possible to go from calmly watching the Presidential debates to sobbing uncontrollably? How can I go from being perfectly OK and in control of my emotions to being a wreck? My only explanation is that the power of my emotion is rooted in the powerful love of my Mother. She was such an incredible human being with an enormous capacity for love, forgiveness and grace. She daily lived an examplary life. A life that made a difference. A life that invested in others, cared for others, loved others. My hope is to daily strive to be a fraction like her. To put others first. To have a serving, giving heart...I don't think I come close. But I'm trying. And, when I need encouragement I turn to the scriptures. Tonight, the verses of comfort come from Psalms.

Psalm 121
I lift up my eyes to the hills. From where does my help come?
My help comes from the Lord, who made heaven and earth.
He will not let your foot be moved; he who keeps you will not slumber.
Behold, he who keeps Israel will neither slumber nor sleep.
The Lord is your keeper; the Lord is your shade on your right hand.

Happy Birthday, Boys!!!

In the past two weeks Jason and Jonathan both had "milestone" birthdays. Jason said goodbye to his 20s turning 30 and Jonathan said goodbye to his teens, turning the big 2-0! Mom would have been so proud to see her boys getting older and celebrating life. She always enjoyed making a spectacle of our birthdays. She knew how to make us feel special and loved, so this year I tried to do the same for the boys. Throwing Jason a big party in Washington and taking Jonathan out for a steak dinner in Austin. I think she'd be proud of the way we love and support each other. Happy Birthday boys...here's to many more years!